.I'm a tree that grows hearts.

USEFUL INFO ...

FYI - Through a rapist's eyes!
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what
they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They
are most likely to go after a woman w ith a ponytail, bun, braid or other
hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a
woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women
whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors
around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through their
purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard
and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from/attacked at is a grocery
store parking lot.

5] Number two are office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three are public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and
quickly move her to a second location where they don't have to worry about
getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because
it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you
isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or
other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the
attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys
you're not worth it.

POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:

1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with
you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a
question, like 'what time is it', or make general small talk like 'can't
believe it is so cold out here, we're in for a bad winter'. Now that
you've seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose
appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you
and yell 'Stop!' or 'Stay back!' Most of the rapists this man talked to
said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not
be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it
and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling 'I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY!'
and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can do
it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind,
pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in
the upper inner thigh - HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told
him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her
and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands
the guy needed
stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand
it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a
particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is
extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him
want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is
that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start
causing trouble, and he's out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and
bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on
them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure,
and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of
your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd
behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel a little
silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was
trouble.

FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ...

I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be some
time, when you will go "Hmm... I must remember that." After reading,
forward it to someone you care about. Never hurts to be careful in this
crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Taekwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If
you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : If a robber asks for
your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you...
chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than
you and he will go for the wallet and/or purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER
DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail
lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The
driver won't see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating,
working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list,
etc.)
DON'T DO THIS!The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect
opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your
head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU LOCK YOUR DOORS...LEAVE!

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking
garage:
a. Be aware. Look around you. Look into your car, at the passenger side
floor, and in the back seat.

b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger
door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their
vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

c. Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the
passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car,
you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a
guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN
SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are
horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS
RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And
even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get
you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking,
well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting
women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into
his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next
victim.